We can learn so much...
Good day Mr Derbyshire,
I don’t know why but I get the feeling that you have a keen interest in ornithology or bird-watching as it is known to the layman, so i know you will look kindly at my funding proposal.
For many years i’ve been, like Dr Dolittle, talking to the animals. The most communicative of the animal kingdom in my research have been the birds, specifically, the Robins.
I can’t count the number of conversations I’ve had with them. They have very long memories (they pass them down father to son) so they can remember the Civil War and even the first Thanksgiving!
One even told me how his great great great great great grandad was there when Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas!
Problem is, not only are they a little bit deaf, but they don’t understand my questions so well. But i’ve invented a megaphone device that enables the red breasted creatures to both understand and hear me. I’ve made three so far but want to scale it up to become the Uber of the bird talking world!
This could really be the goose that lays the golden egg! So send me a couple of million minimum!
Buddy J Mattes