Investigation Interview Request

Tax Avoidance and Bono Tricks

Paradise Papers

Dear Mr Derbyshire

I work for The Guardian newspaper in London, and I am currently investigating the Paradise Papers. I would be grateful if you could call me to arrange an interview as I have some serious questions for you.

Your name has turned up 18000 times in connection with what can only be described as an unbelievable number of offshore companies and other tax avoidance schemes. Strange - as I can see from your website that you claim you are trying to get rid of your money rather than hoard it away.

Your name turns up over and over and again, and when I call anybody in regards to my research, I keep getting referred to you. In fact, when I contacted Buckingham Palace regarding the Queen’s investments from her private estate Her Majesty called me herself and said ‘Speak to Bazzer D’. On my way home later the same day, a car with blacked out windows tried to run me over. 

I’m also puzzled by the purchase of 12 F-35 Lightning II fighter jets that were bought from Lewis Hamilton in July last year. The £13million retainer you appear to pay Bono every year to perform close up magic tricks has also raised a few eyebrows. These queries are the tip of the iceberg.

I am looking forward to hearing from you Bazzer D

Just call the Guradian Newspaper in London or pop in for a coffee if you are passing.

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Comments (1)

  • Barry

    Barry

    • 27 January 2018 at 16:18
    • #

    Dear The Guardian - I am currently in hiding from my enemies and won't be able to pop in for a coffee. Don't believe everything you read in the papers. It was 10 fighter jets and Bono was hired to perform card tricks for me and Ivan at my birthday party last year. Ok, it was a lookalike that turned up but he was still good.

    All the best

    Barry

    PS. the car thing wasn't my idea

    reply

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